all in all it's not so bad...

Work couldn't pass by any slower tonight. Really it couldn't, every hour has felt like three hours and I've only been here for three hours so it feels like nine hours. That was a really awkward sentence, but I'm leaving it.
The Setbacks played a show at South Park last night. It was really therapeutic. We played like a well-oiled machine and the only mishap we had was when I broke a string and went to switch guitars at the exact time that Bryan decided to stop playing to tune his guitar. It felt a lot better than our last show. I remember leaving our last show and not even wanting to hear compliments from the people that came because I was sure they were all lying since I felt so bad about how we played. Last night was different though, what people said or didn't say didn't matter. All that mattered was that we had a great time playing, and honestly I think every show should be that way! I wish I didn't have to hear from other people before I can make up my own mind about how the show went. I wish I could always feel like I did last night where I was confident enough to know it went alright.
I'm so tired right now. All the double shifts I've worked this week plus the show last night have really drained me. I just have to make it through tonight and work tomorrow and then I can relax tomorrow night. I think Mari and I might go see a movie. We haven't done that in awhile so it should be nice.

misty water-colored memories...

I was reminded last night of how lucky I truly am. When I arrived home from work last night Mari and our friend, Amber were up watching home videos from our senior year of high school. I'm always up for a trip down memory lane so I stayed up and watched some of the video with them. It was funny to me to watch those movies and see how I followed Mari around like a little puppy dog even though I was dating somebody else at the time that some of those events took place. I say I was reminded of how lucky I am because I realized that this same girl I chased and pursued is the same woman that I go to sleep next to every night and the same woman I wake up next to every morning! I guess I haven't thought about that for awhile. We get so caught up in the craziness of our days (school, work, taking care of Joel, band practice, etc.) that I tend to forget how good I really have it!

i'd rather be knocked down than be knocked out...

Do you ever feel like everything is an uphill battle? I feel like I'm having to fight in every area of my life just to get an inch further up the mountain. If you've ever read this at all then you know my passions are my family and my band. Everything with my family is great except that Mari and I see each other even less now that she's working too. The plus side is I've had more time with Joel this semester though, so that's a real blessing! I actually get to see him when he learns new things now, not just hear about them. Things with the band have been going well too except that we never practice which can take a toll on a band. The last time we really practiced aggressively was right before our last show which was in March. We had a band meeting a week ago and it was really good because it seems like we were all about to burst with the things we've kept from each other for awhile. We haven't kept things from each other on purpose we just never see each other. A band is like a marriage and a lot of times when you don't see each other you get angry, but you're really only angry because you miss each other.
I'm just waiting for school to be over. School seems like the biggest obstacle and heaviest weight dragging me down. School keeps me from seeing my family as much as I would like to and it keeps me from seeing my band as much as I would like to.
I hate to write such a downer of a post. There's just so much going through my head right now and it's not all as positive as I would like it to be. Bear with me now...